A scoop on my life.

Running into strangers...

2009-10-09T20:29:00.001-07:00

Have you ever had days where you just seem to be constantly running into people you know? Today, I went to dinner down a cute street called Cary Town and I ran into two strangers. Person #1 was one of the yoga instructors from my gym. Person #2 was the Bare Escentials lady who helped me out at the mall. It always catches me by surprise when I run into "strangers" outside of where I have seen them initially. It's like realizing for the first time that professors and TAs have lives outside of lecture halls and classrooms when I see them outside of school.

Yes, I am a bit (maybe a lot) obsessed.

2009-07-23T08:45:00.000-07:00

So you know when you try something out, and it's cool and all if you don't succeed and just move on? At least that's how it is for me with sports or anything that involves coordination. However, when I stumbled upon the idea of making French macarons for the first time, I thought it would be just like any hobby or activity I start--I would just get bored and move on. It was quite the opposite, as I learned how hard and fickled macarons were to make that it made me more determined to get it down at some point. How hard could it be? Ha. No wonder they charged 3 dollars for a quarter sized macaron! I read baking blogs online and picked up tips here and there, and more assuringly, I read that a lot of bakers (even professionals) struggled to get macarons down, not just once or twice, but sometimes dozens of times. Phew! It's not just me.

This is a picture of the batter at the right consistency, as I'm letting it dry out on the table before I stick it into the oven:

This is one of my "macawrongs." These were supposed to be chocolate macarons. I knew they were the hardest to make because the acidity of the cocoa powder would interfere with the stability of the meringue inside the batter, but I tried nonetheless. Plus, I thought, I was somewhat close the very first time I made chocolate ones (see previous post). So I just sent them with my dad to his work. He told his co-workers they were "soft baked chocolate meringues." His co-workers raved that these "baked meringues" were so good. If only they knew what they were supposed to be...The macawrongs in this batch failed because they puckered up due to a few extra unnecessary strokes of folding the batter. : (

On a brighter note, I decided to give up to the French method of making macarons, and decided to try for the first time to try out the Italian method. This involved making a sugar water solution at 118 degrees Celsius, so I had to find a candy thermometer to use, because a meat thermometer didn't reach as high in temperature. Surprisingly, the macarons, aesthetically turned out well. Once again though, there was another problem, there were too many air pockets formed. I baked it at the optimal temperature to prevent them, but they still occured, probably as a result of the Italian styled batter, as warned by many baking bloggers. The tops were flat and smooth with no wrinkles, and feet developed (the frilly skirt thing on the bottom of the macaron). However, with the air pockets, and the dullness of the tops, I still haven't made them correctly. =(

So I'm supposed to sandwich two macarons together with some sort of ganache. Making good ganache will come later...way later.

Conclusion: Macarons win. I lose.

Making macarons, an art?

2009-06-05T17:31:00.000-07:00

I've created a to-do list for this summer, and it includes things like reading Les Miserables, playing Jon Schmidt songs on the piano, and learning how to cook more of my mom's food. The most challenging of my list is probably making French macarons. I miss the macarons from Laduree that my cousin Cathy introduced me to in London so much, that I decided it was time for me to make pseudo-Laduree macarons. My first trial was today, and I tried making chocolate macarons. I burnt half the batch, and cracked a few. However, the ones that did survive, had the perfect shine on the top, and had feet at the bottom. The texture was light and crisp on the outside, and chewy on the inside. I filled them with my mom's homemade strawberry jam. There are so many different factors that can affect them. Temperature too high-cracked tops, temperature too low-air bubbles, overmixing-cracked flat and discolored, undermix-runny.

Trial 2 occurs tomorrow! I think I'm going to try to make matcha green tea macarons instead of chocolate. After perfecting the shell, I need to learn to make good ganaches, creams, jams to fill them with!

Isn't it funny how everything works out in the end?

2009-04-15T22:31:00.000-07:00

So many things have happened to me these past couple weeks. I've had some pretty outrageous, crazy, or plain ridiculous moments, days, or even week. In general, I find myself in these silly situations that may appear absurd or impossible to many, but become quite real to me that I eventually learn to laugh with (not at) myself, if that makes any sense at all; and to realize, as cliche as it may sound, that it's all how I look at it. At the end, everything works out--all the pieces come together.

I mentioned in a very early post about how I've become more mellow over the years, how I think "oh well" to whatever circumstance I come across. Yes, partly it stems from apathy as I've grown more jaded towards a lot of issues that might have mattered more to me at one point in my life, or from disappointment towards certain aspects of reality that makes me think, ignorance is indeed bliss. The other part of this "oh well" attitude is because I have faith that everything will work out, or to say the least, appear to make more sense. And so it's funny when those around me might obsess over something pertaining to me that I might not even obsess or worry about at all. Like a friend once said, what's the point of worrying? Truth. Because, tomorrow will worry for itself. Nonetheless, I'm still happy and grateful every single time something works out.

flowers, flowers..and more flowers?

2009-04-06T18:08:00.000-07:00

I don't really appreciate flowers (with the exception of tulips), and I definitely don't understand trees. Nonetheless, that's what my weekend was filled with. I went to the annual cherry blossom festival in DC, which was super crowded and fun. Lots of Japanese musical performances, street fair foods, crazy anime people (no offense if you identify with one). I had to take the picture above of the girl dressed up as an anime girl. I took a boat ride of the Potomac River, and ended up sunburnt.

Tulips! My favorite, although I couldn't find purple tulips, my favorite of them all.

The picture of the cacti above cracks me up because they look like soft churro! It made me crave some...yum.

The cutest chow-chow ever.

Cherry blossoms!

Takes too long to upload, so tis all for now.

Spring!

2009-04-02T09:09:00.001-07:00

Spring is finally here! Well, it's been here for a few days I think? It's crazy because I'm not used to having seasons. Here in Virginia, the seasons aren't even super extreme like it may be in upper Northeast. Anyways, this is a picture of the tree on front of my house. It was just bare branches during the winter, but now it's blooming pink flowers. At first, I thought they were pink leaves that were budding, because little red buds were the only thing growing out. More spring pictures to come from the cherry blossom festival in DC this weekend!

personality = specialty

2009-03-06T17:24:00.000-08:00

How would you describe your family practice doctor? Or say, a surgeon, dermatologist, ob/gyn? So apparently, what I've learned recently was that there are particular personality types that are better suited for one specialty over another. True, medical students chose specialties that they enjoy most, but what they enjoy most might very well be what environment suits them best. So here are a few stereotypes that I found out about:

surgery: type A personality, strong-minded

radiology: antisocial, not a people person, doesn't want patient interaction

anesthesiology: wants to contribute, get work done, but also want to enjoy other parts of their lives, laid back, chill

pyschiatry: quirky, weird, secretly wanting to self-diagnose

ob/gyn: tend to be the pretty girls of the class

dermatology: the pretty girls in the class with the brains (it's the hardest or 2nd hardest specialty to get into)

internal medicine: the nerds, the ones who want to know everything (since that's what the specialty kind of is about)

family medicine: people friendly, likes to build relationship with patients

I wonder...what field I will end up in. LOL.

btw, the weather here is ridiculous, it was as low as 10 degrees on Sunday when it snowed 5 or 6 inches and I played in the snow, to today it's super dry and in the 60s and I went to a barbeque in a tank top. Ridiculous!

let it snow. let it snow. let it snow!

2009-03-02T07:07:00.000-08:00

It finally snowed in Virginia yesterday. First snow day of the season, and in March! I don't have snow clothes here though to go sledding. Next year, next year!

I miss UCLA! :(

2009-02-19T06:06:00.000-08:00

Ah! I finally saw the end of the year DVD that Hoang made (thanks Hoang)! It made me so happy, yet sad to see it. I can't believe it's close to a year since we graduated. Sorry Thuy, I used your collage you had for your fb profile at one point because I still don't have any or most of the pictures from college. I still need to steal them from you guys! I'm so glad for such a good group of friends at UCLA. Couldn't have asked for better fun (and often random) moments during college =). Thanks guys!!!

P.S. It is not "fin" yet!

Ah the hesitation of a public post

2009-02-16T18:33:00.000-08:00

Many times I find myself in the mood to journal or blog. My friend Mon who came for an interview was writing in a journal every day that she was here, and it reminded me of my Sanrio Keroppi diary that had a little plastic lock! I thought it was such a good idea at how often she wrote in it. It would be nice to go back and read it. I stopped however, because as a kid, I'd only write about the really good times or the really bad times. I usually have these crazy ideas in my head that I want to convey, but then I grow hesitant, and ultimately either write about a completely different topic or not write at all (the latter being more often than not). The problems of a public blog! So...hopefully I don't end up going off tangent like I usually do. =P.

Lately, I've had friends re-appear in and others disappear out of my life. In the past, I would go after the ones who would start to disappear. In other words, I would make an effort to keep in touch with them or to continue to be there for them the way that they were not for me. It's sad to realize what can get in the way of a friendship between two people.... relationships, jobs, other friends, life! Back in the days, I'd hold the light in the dark, until the friend decides to come back. Now, I don't know whether I'd call these individuals friends or mere acquaintances, or whether or not I'm jaded or simply not naive anymore. And then there are the friends who suddenly pop in my life. It's funny who I've gotten closer with too. There are a few friends that I talk to on almost a daily basis, who I might not have even spoke to unless I ran into them. It's kind of weird actually sometimes...

And to the friends who have always been my friends, thank you. :)

Dare to explore?!

2009-01-30T14:28:00.000-08:00

Apparently Church Hill (the part of Richmond that I'm living in) had a railway tunnel built underneath it during the 1870s, but the two entrances were blocked off by 1925 because of an accident that occurred, as the tunnel began collapsing on the inside, and trapped a train and some of the workers on it! The train and some of the bodies were never removed, so it's still in that underground tunnel! I've never noticed this as I've gone running through the parks around here. When it gets warmer, Sarah and I are planning on finding both of these blocked off entrances. At least with the East entrance, it's not blocked off for a couple hundred feet, and supposedly the railroad tracks are still there. This is the picture of the West entrance from Wikipedia.

Weekly Rituals.

2009-01-11T07:27:00.000-08:00

I love being spontaneous as much as I love having ritualistic activities to do on a regular basis--if that even makes sense. I like taking a drive in the middle of the night to destination "Unknown." I like deciding to go to NYC two days before.

I also like having something regular and consistent, like my Sunday Soy Latte days. Every Sunday, Linh and I stop by this cute European cafe for their soy lattes. While every Friday a group of us have our gelato and pho night after a hard (haha) studious week. Various Sundays we have boardgame night, and once a week we have our potlucks! I decided to blog about this just because it's Sunday and I'm waiting for my latte!

Oh also, I've gotten into coffee and tea more and more lately. I was already really into it back in college (hence why I worked at Coffee Bean). I caught myself being a coffee snob =O the other day when I requested extra dense foam, since I could tell the difference between good and bad (which is what it typically is at chain-coffee shops like Starbucks) foam. It's actually quite an art to perfect foam. You have to angle the steam wand at a particular degree, have the tip below the surface of milk only a few millimeters, and move it in a consistent particular pace too. Perfect foam is so firm that you can stand a metal spoon in the middle, and it won't fall over! Most people end up making bubbly watery foam that look nothing more than soap suds. Or people over heat the milk above the right range. Anywho, enough about this coffee talk. Lo siento!

Okay so on a random non-tangential note.... so I was having a discussion with someone about pulling off looks, and sadly, I realized I can't pull off bad ass white trash...This is a picture from the summer when we had our Derby themed party at our house. This is me with my two roommates:

I mean I can't pull of white trash 100% Well because I'm not...white! But for being asian, I feel that's as close as you can get to being white trash. This discussion came up because the same person I was talking to said he couldn't see me pulling off barbaric, tough stuff-type Viking as a costume!

Toodles.
Mon

A "just because" post.

2009-01-09T15:16:00.000-08:00

Over break, I went to the SD zoo, hoping to find my <3, the manatee (a.k.a. cow of the sea). Instead, I found this fella:

I'm coming home.

2008-12-18T00:21:00.000-08:00

It's 3:22 AM and I am pulling my 2nd semi all-nighter. The first time was with my cousins a few years ago, when we decided to stay up playing games until seven in the morning. This time, I'm just too excited to be home with friends and family in just a few hours. I'm still in the midst of packing and cleaning. I'm zoning out...perhaps from the lack of sleep and the post-exam feeling? Speaking of which, I was on campus from 8 to 5 today for two exams.

Rapelling!

2008-11-30T15:54:00.000-08:00

This is what I did a few weeks ago randomly. We were walking the dog at this park on this island thing near school, and the man in red was giving a girl and her boyfriend rapelling lessons, and we stood and watched. The instructor asked if we wanted to do it for free. This part was kinda scary, leaning back in order to be perpendicular against the cliff.

Halloween = Old

2008-10-31T19:54:00.000-07:00

I carved a pumpkin for the first time today. And although it was my first time, I was a bit ambitious (maybe over ambitious) and decided to carve not just any classic jack-o-lantern face, but the silhouette of Frankenstein's face. The face came out, but the facial features were a tad off centered, well maybe more than just a little. It was also my first time passing out candy to the kids. It was this that made me realize how old I am getting. There was one really cute boy in a police costume who was probably around 4 or 5 years old, and he mumbled, "I can arrest you!" to us when we joked about him being a police. But anyways, another realization I had was that kids can be so greedy! There were kids who were super polite, saying "Happy Halloween," and "thank you." On the other hand, there were kids, who I'd tell them to pick ONE, and they would grab a huge handful. And then there were kids who came up didn't say anything, and went directly for the candy, or would try to sneak an extra one. I wonder whether their parents know that they're being greedy and aren't disciplining their kids or just simply do not know! I remember when I used to trick-or-treat, my parents made sure I didn't just run up and grab whatever I wanted. More than anything, I was more hesitant to just grab from a bowl full of candy sitting around than to recieve one being handed out. So in conclusion, in the future, if you have kids, make sure they're not greedy and discipline them!!

I <3 NY

2008-10-27T18:35:00.000-07:00

Ah! I don't know how to put pictures on this blogspot! But anyways, this is a picture of the city outside of the gigantic 2 or however many stories high Apple store! I just noticed the guy in the foreground of the picture. Almost looks like I meant to include him in the picture! haha.
This above is a picture of a bridge in the famous Central Park! We sat on the grass, eating Magnolia's cupcakes while people watching.
Of course, any trip wouldn't be a trip with out a food journey to Tom's Restaurant. Recognize where that is from? It's filmed in Seinfeld as the restaurant they'd go to!
And of course, Serendipity, the place made famous by the movie itself. Supposedly they're known for their frozen hot chocolate. It was actually rather disappointing to wait for 2 hours and pay 10 bucks for what tasted a lot like Coffee Bean's Pure Chocolate Ice Blended drink!

Megabus might be one thing, but the Chinatown bus to NYC is definitely another thing. The bus left at 12:30 AM and we got into the city around 5:45 AM. One of the most memorable parts of the trip was the Banksy Exhibit. It was the first exhibit, since most of his other art is street art. This "Pet Shop" exhibit is super cool. Here are some pictures from it:You can read more about the exhibit by googling "Banksy Pet Shop" exhibit. Basically though, he's commenting on our society's views of animals as meat, particularly processed meats and pets. In the above picture, it's an image of fish sticks swimming in the fishbowl. Check out this video:
And as to the rest of the trip, we walked around NYU's campus, walked around Saks Fifth Avenue, and ate dim sum in Chinatown! Okay, goodbye until the next anatomy exam!

NYC!

2008-10-11T20:42:00.000-07:00

I'm going to NYC next weekend! I'm taking some shady bus to NYC, similar to mega bus. haha

Free Health Clinics

2008-10-09T19:54:00.000-07:00

Having an 8AM-10PM day has left me tired, worn out, burnt..and frustrated. It was my first time volunteering at a free clinic. I practiced doing histories on patients, as well as vitals and physical examination. The patient interviews and write-ups took a while, so I only saw two cases and they focused on male genitalia problems. I think the patients were uncomfortable initially to show their problem area on front of me, more so than my partner, an M2 male student. Although free clinics somewhat help individuals who do not have or can not afford health insurance, the extent of the help can only go so far. At the end it boils down to insurance or having money, which basically are interchangeable concepts. The attending doctor that I would present my cases to would make decisions that were always dependent on what the patient could afford as a treatment option. It didn't matter too much whether or not a name was given to the ailment, disease, or condition. It was whether or not the patient had the means to afford treatment. Over the counter meds, cheap home remedies, and time are not always feasible solutions to every problem. At the end, patients go home not any better than they were before, well except maybe a little enlightenment on what they have, or why they might be in pain, but not any better than the few hours they spend waiting at the clinic. Sadly, the clinic may come up with solutions, but the best ones are not always affordable.

Virginia State Fair

2008-10-04T18:55:00.000-07:00

Ah my stomach hurts so much, I can barely type right now. I ate ginormous amounts of fair food. So full that I didn't get a chance to pet the animals nor ride the rides! Everything at the fair is fried..fried corn on the cob, pork parfaits, fried pickle slices, fried twinkies. They even have something literally called "diabetic funnel cake"! Dude, I don't know how I'm going to the Italian Street Festival tomorrow. No more food! Oye Chan!

OMG, Totoro is so cute! I'm watching it right now, first time seeing it.

HALLOWEEN is coming.

2008-10-01T12:52:00.000-07:00

Guess one of the things I'm going to be for Halloween? A VIKING! GRRRRR. Can you guys see me as a Viking? hehe. I was on my way to study at the coffee shop near my house this weekend with a friend, and I ran into my neighbor's yard sale. They were selling the Viking costume and this really slutty Taxi driver costume. One of my neighbors, Justin, said I should go for the Taxi driver costume. -_- I opted to go for the less slutty Viking costume. It even comes with fuzzy fur cuffs for my arms. LOL. I need to get a Viking helmet though. I'm excited for Halloween, because it's supposedly a big thing here. I'm going to go to a pumpkin patch and pick out a pumpkin for the first time and carve it! Apparently, the Edgar Poe museum is having a special Halloween themed event as well!

living up to my screen name.

2008-09-30T19:35:00.000-07:00

Ahh! So right now, I'm itching like CRAZY. I have huge swollen rashes all over my arms. I don't know what bit me...I thought they were ants from sitting on the grass at the park from a picnic...but new bites have shown up. I think a mosquito is living in my room, and feasting on me at night...or from walking on the streets. who knows.

Oh yeah, so I got an ice cream maker for my birthday from my roommates, so I started making my own ice cream and sorbets. It's my new hobby, after I left my old dusty guitar at home, and gave up on that hobby. I kinda miss playing the piano though...

Today's ice cream: chocolate peanut butter ice cream with bits of homemade peanut butter patties, and a fudge ripple.

Time to anti-itch creme my bites AGAIN.

Promoting obesity...not really...but basically yeah.

2008-09-20T06:27:00.000-07:00

Last night I went out for Korean food with some friends for dinner, tons of Korean bbq.

Then I came home to my roommate's "in-celebration-of-my-clean-room" steak and wine party (that was held in her room...well...in celebration...of her finally cleaning her room!) and had juicy >2 in. steaks and really good wine. Oh by the way, I found out why people pair steak and wine together, the steak makes the wine taste so different afterwards! So good. Anyways, we got hungry afterwards, but not for steak, well because I had korean bbq before, and the friends there had burgers and fried chicken before as well.

So we decided to go get buffalo wings at this fabulous place called buffalo wild wings. Not only did we get buffalo wings, but we had some cheese fries. However, the whole time I was still craving a donut, because a few days earlier one of my roommates and I were watching some "Donuts around the US" show thing or whatever on the Food Network and started to want some, but it was late and we didn't know what was open.

So being persistant about having my sweet tooth satisfied, I called up Krispy Kreme and found out that they were open 24 hours, so I had 2 1/2 donuts. I could have probably eaten a dozen, but I want to be able to fit out of the car door, and then I was reminded of Diabetes which we learned about in class. One friend was like, Monika you don't want your leg amputated do you from getting Diabetes?? Nor did I want to develop Metabolic Syndrome X which basically would lead to Diabetes at some point. So yeah. Anyways, hopefully my next post will be the opposite of this. My next post will be active. Really.

lessons learned/note to self...

2008-09-16T14:21:00.000-07:00

Missing review sessions to go shopping at H&M might not be worth it.

Facebook pokers who are NOT your facebook friends = weird.

Keep bedroom door closed or else dog will hide bone in bed, under pillow.

Check weather before wearing a summer/sheer dress and flip flops out into the rain and wind...

Get on the right bus.

Awkward turtle/balloon/tent/snail/turkey/starfish doesn't really exist here.

Don't lose a spot in the suturing workshop by forgetting to confirm spot...

Five Guys burgers is BETTER than In-n-out (sorry to say).

Arrested Development is good.

Must get soul food!

I want an ice cream maker.

The end for now. Pho time!

Cheers.

procrastination

2008-09-14T07:38:00.001-07:00

So instead of studying for my exams tomorrow, I found this:

I'm becoming more Vietnamese. Sorta.

2008-09-06T13:23:00.000-07:00

So I've never really cooked viet food before, aside from making banh bot loc (the clear things steamed in banana leaves) and goi cuon (spring rolls). However, I made egg rolls yesterday for a little potluck! A layer of oil probably formed on my face after frying them. They turned out like my mom's! So I'm happy about that. Oh so a storm is rolling in this weekend over here. Storms suck. They really do. The rain makes a good study environment though.

OH EM GEE.

2008-08-26T19:45:00.000-07:00

GAH. I have so much stuff to study, this is impossible and beyond ridiculous! During orientation, they told us that it was impossible to study for everything and that we should shoot towards knowing 80% of the material. At this point...I don't even know if it's possible.

The beginning of the end.

2008-08-17T18:39:00.001-07:00

So it's been a long time since I last posted an entry, and I figured now was best. Hopefully I don't end up rambling about nothing forever again. Tomorrow is my first day of medical school. I'm a bit anxious to see how bad it can get, because everyone (med students and professors) have warned me about how arduous and steep this hill will be. I got my syllabus a few days ago (a.k.a. course reader) for my 3 classes, foundation of medicine, population medicine, and biochemistry...which is probably about a foot high...literally. It still feels really surreal for me that I'm taking on this so called "arduous" journey. Honestly, I feel like I just entered a high school environment with undergraduate level classes. There's about 195 students in my class, people are forming their "groups," there are formals and socials, student government like ASB. My mentality is still what it was last year, that I wouldn't need to study much, only the day or two days before the exam, but of course I've been warned that it was a necessity to study every day, and that falling behind means never catching up. I know it won't hit me tomorrow that I'm not an undergrad nor a high school student anymore, but when it does hit...it will hit hard.

About Virginia, I love it here so far! But then again, I'm all about change, taking on new things, new environments, etc. I met two awesome roommates who so far are very considerate and friendly. I get along with them, and they're very different from me and from most people I've hung out with. One roommate, Sarah will be running for vice president for student body. She's really outgoing and sarcastic. She will be setting up a ton of costume parties at our place. Marcie my other roommate is also very social, she's also really athletic--plays field hockey. The most awesomest thing so far is that she rides a motorcycle and gave me my first ride around the city.

Living in Richmond, also means living near the James River, which equals tubing! I went tubing on one of those black tire like lifesaver things down the river. Got a lot of gooey gunk on me. Some people swung on a rope to jump into the river, or went down the waterfall. I'm not that adventurous yet, and I don't want to die either. I was waiting at the rocks on the other end for everyone, and I got super hungry, and stared at this family having a bbq like an orphan, and they called us over to have some bbq food. I'm excited for many of these firsts, and many more to come like jet skiing at one roommate's house, exploring D.C., going to the fairs in North Carolina for awesome BBQ food from the South, and going shopping and fine dining in NYC. I'm excited for having 4 seasons (minus snow), and shopping for winter clothing, and layering up. I've met some snobby people, but I've also met some down to earth people who I think I will have a lot of fun with. My roommates and I are friends with these guys who I feel will substitute the spot of "the guys" of 424 Veteran...Hoang, Jon, Ryan...but of course never replace your spots! Hmm what else...oh being the ice cream lover that I am, I found this awesome home made ice cream shop. There's even boba here (in memory of Volcano)! The city here is very different, people are friendlier, but there are also some sketchy areas. People don't honk like they do in LA. When my dad was in town to help me move in, this lady honked at us at the gas station numerous times. We thought she was being an @$$ and wanted us to move out of the way, but all she wanted to say was...nice car, i like your car!

Ah I just realized how much of a change this is. New car, new dog, new house, new roommates, new place, new friends!

I hate....the game.

2008-05-29T10:45:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning, and the first thing that was on my mind was The Game. And yes...I know I just lost the game right now again. I can't believe I'm leaving for Europe in two weeks! It's weird having these mixed feelings about graduation. Excitement towards Europe, yet sadness in realizing that the day I leave for Europe is the last day I'll see a lot of people for a long time. I won't say the last day necessarily, because I will make an effort to see the friends who matter in my life, but it will definitely be a long while before I can. Once again, my post has taken a turn, away from the title of it. I'm blessed to have such awesome friends, and I guess in the end it means much more that I am sad to leave college because I've had such a great time with the people around me, than would it mean if I cared less about college and wanted desperately to get out. oh bittersweetness.

great times, awesome friends, lots of laughter!

2008-05-04T00:35:00.000-07:00

This past week has been awesome! My directors at my admin. job were out of town for the whole week for conferences and so of course that meant I had to work super duper hard, hunched over my assignments, feverishly setting up the lesson plans. Assignments that would take me at most 2 or 3 hours to complete if I wanted to, but stretched over a span of a week. It got to the point that I was bored of sitting around, chatting on my blackberry. I'm paranoid though, that the people who work in the other departments are spying on me for my directors and will tell them that I have been coming in a tad late and leaving a tad early (nothing more than half an hour or so of my four hour work shifts), or that I've been on the phone for half the time and using the internet.

Oh well, I guess. Oh well! This "oh well" thing has been my mentality lately. Oh well to unanswered care extender e-mails. Oh well to walking in late to Coffee Bean. Oh well to not looking at what my tutoring students are studying for LS2. Oh well to not studying for my midterm. After writing all of this (and there are way more "oh well" moments that could waste space here), I just realized how bad this mindset is! What I initially blamed senioritis for, might actually be something more malignant and long-term than senioritis is! I tried to be more productive, do more things, read more, try new hobbies, etc.

Okay, so I just realized that I totally deterred from my main purpose of this blog, as apparent by the mismatch between the title and the content. I guess what I initially wanted to write will be reserved for the next post...oh well! =)

Ambiguity.

2008-04-25T23:53:00.000-07:00

Every Tuesday when I walk to my second job, I always see this person walking in my direction. The person is usually wearing a faded business shirt and slacks, with the hair tied back away from the face, and a pair of typical black sunglasses. And every Tuesday, I have the same single question running through my head, and that question is, is the person a woman or a man? I'm not trying to be mean or critical. It's not like the person is an unattractive female or male, who I am laughing at. I rarely see people who I'd even label as unattractive in the first place. He/she is kind of like the guy/girl on 50 First Dates (which is another question on it's own). There are times when this individual looks more like a masculine female, while other days the individual looks like a slightly womanly man. I think it's the sunglasses that are throwing me off, because without seeing the eyes, I can't really complete the picture of his/her face.

Similar to my second job, at my third job, I've had kids in my class who I can't tell whether or not they're tomboys or really just boys. This, of course, is probably due to their young age, and with longer hair, it's hard to tell. It's not like they've reached puberty yet and can obviously be distinguished by facial hair or a deeper voice. I think I would have been one of those kids, because I did look sort of boy-ish. Luckily because I wasn't athletic, and my hair was long enough to surpass the ambiguous tomboy/boy length, I usually passed as a girl (although pictures were definitely another story).

So conclusion? Because I looked like a boy when I was younger, that characteristic might have carried on, and I should prevent the possibility of ambiguity by not wearing sunglasses or unisex clothes, like business clothes.

Childhood's Problems

2008-04-20T19:56:00.000-07:00

I've had the opportunity to work closely with kids lately through my new job, and it amazes me at how the most trivial details are the details kids fight over. I had a bag of pencils for all of them to use, and there was a few "cool" pencils that they all pushed and shoved to get. The color of play dough is even an issue. Ten kids wanted the turquoise colored one, and I had to play the number guessing game to decide which lucky kid would get it. I shake my head at the issues that concern kids most, only to realize that I was just like any of them at their age. I'm hesitant to admit that I cared about the type of Sanrio pencil box I carried around, or what type of candy color I got even. The reality then was that these details mattered. The details were just too important to overlook. Luckily, I don't care about such things anymore (I hope), but it makes me wonder what do I care about now that I might deem as frivolous in the future? I can already make a long list of things I cared about in high school, that I've learned is no longer important in college. I think the scarier part would be if I don't continue to grow in clearly seeing what is important in life and what isn't. What if 10 years from now, I look back and still care about the same things?

So this is it, I guess...

2008-04-18T02:24:00.000-07:00

...to becoming a blogger that is! Hopefully I will have much more to say than my last site.